It's September...

It seems like the question I always ask is "How did that happen?" when it refers to time that has gone by, how my children have aged so fast, etc.  I blogged about nine-months ago.  It's not that I haven't had very much to say, I think I just haven't had time to Blog about it.

Things have changed drastically in those nine-months.  I spent a week in recovery at the hospital.  I lived next to my in-laws for four months after we returned to Idaho, we moved into a new house, and I'm expanding my purse and jewelry business to include clothes.  My first order of clothes will be here today.  I'm so excited!  It takes a lot to get me excited about anything anymore, so I think this is a good thing.

Life has changed so much.  I'm still not over not being on the farm or having the animals, but I am trying.  I think the busy work of the new business will help.

Well, it's 7:56 a.m. and I need to take the boys to school, so off for another few months...  Just kidding -- I think.

It's been almost a year since I blogged -- really??

I find it so hard to believe that, but I guess the past year hasn't left much time for anything else.  As a family who doesn't move more than every few years, we moved twice this year in the course of about three-months.

We are living in the same town (I guess it's technically a city, but it's hard for me to recognize it as that) that Brian works in and the city where we met.  It's nice for him to not have to commute 3 1/2 hours each way to work once-a-week, but I'm still not sure how I feel about it -- especially this time of year.

For Thanksgiving, we went back to Idaho for the week and spent the Holiday with Brian's family.  We got to be with Kassie and Matthew, and it felt good.

I hate to travel on Christmas and there is no way to load up everything the kid's get for Christmas and it's just not fair to say SURPRISE!!!!, now get in the car!  It's still hard though.  This is the time of the year that while I don't miss "my" parents per se, I just miss having parents, or rather a family.  I know that I'm 31 years-old and I'm trying hard to get past it, but it's still difficult.

I am looking forward to going to Sundance Film Festival in January, which is my Christmas present from Brian.  I truly will NOT mind not having anything under the tree, just knowing that I get to look forward to that.

I will try to be better about Blogging this next year.  There just isn't much to talk about anymore.

Love you all,

C.

Spare time...

Hummm..... well, spare time, used to be a concept that was completely foreign to me.  I had heard that it existed, but wasn't exactly sure what it was.  I have since discovered.

I am not working outside the home and farm right now, due to some health issues of my own and of course with the challenges that the two youngest boys have.

I consume my days with "mommy" things and have since moved on to working out a few times a week.  For example:  this morning after falling asleep at almost 3 a.m., got up, got the boys up, made them buscuits and gravy, made me some coffee, helped Colton with chores, did the dishes and took the boys to school.  I then took Easton with me and we headed to the Y.  We sat in the eating area while I checked emails on my phone and he ate his fruit snacks and then I took him to Child Watch, which he wasn't completely impressed over.

I then went and did three laps on the track and did the circuit (weight-resistance machines).  Then I headed down to take Zumba at 9:15.  That is a class that will seriously kick your A$$!  I am going to hurt for days I think, but I think it will be worth it in the end. 

I promised Easton that we would swim when I was done, so I picked him up from Child Watch and we donned our swimsuits and headed to the pool.  He is getting quite good at the kickboard with his little life jacket on.  It's good for him with the problems he has with myopathy.

We then sat in the hot tub for a few minutes, which I was desperately needing by that time.

Came home, ate leftover potato soup for lunch and took a nap until the boys got home.  Then, got up and attempted to clean up my house, which is in itself a never ending battle.

Luckily, had enough leftovers from the past few meals for dinner.  Watched a couple of episodes I had DVR's of a great new show on the CW called, Life UneXpected.  Very cute.

Now, the little boys are watching Marley and Me and my current DVD Media project is stalled because I now am waiting for the files to compress.

It's 7:01 p.m.  Brian hasn't been home in seven days.  Can't afford to go shopping, as much as I believe that is life's BEST therapy.  LOL.

I'm too restless to watch a movie and really don't want to drag all of my scrapbooking stuff out, because Darren will INSIST on helping me.

I detest making appointments, because there is always a doctor or dentist appointment to deal with.  I am not in the condition to commit myself to any charities or organizations -- I finally got myself disentangled from all of that and responsibilities and my babies keep me from taking off on a trip, soooooo.............. what shall I do now???

What New Year's has to offer...

I always find New Year's much like those little two words at the end of a good novel, 'The End.'  This year especially, I saw that with a much exasperated sigh of relief.  This year needs to be over.  In fact, entering a new decade gives me even more hope.

While the Millenium provided me with a wonderful husband and my lifelong partner, as well as two of my children being born in this decade; it was overall, extremely challenging.  I know that this doesn't just go for me.  I have seen so many people struggle over the past few years in a variety of ways.

Tomorrow offers us all a fresh dose of hope, an encouraging emotional breath of a desire for something different, for change.  It has made me think about so many of the things that I hope to happen in the next decade:

Our daughter will graduate high school and will leave for college.
Our two oldest sons will graduate, God willing.
Our oldest children MIGHT get married before the end of this decade.
We MIGHT be Grandparents in the next ten years. (GASP!!!)
We might persevere through some of these struggles and a live a more stress-free life.  (Hoping.)
We will hopefully be more selective about the relationships that we develop and keep. 
Our beloved dog Berkley, will probably live his last in this decade.  (Very sad.)
We will very possibly lose Brian's Grandparents.  (I don't even want to think about it.)

There are so many things that are possible.  So many things that are sure to happen.  Not all good, you can be certain, but hopefully the scale will tip in that favor.

I just know that right now, I am looking forward to the mere possiblity of leaving all of this behind.  I'm not sure why the ticking of a clock towards midnight offers me that aspiration, but it does.

I hope and pray that this year and this next decade help all of our wishes come true; it allows those we love to remain healthy and safe and prosperous; that we have as minimal heartache as anyone should have to endure, and above all that we are loved and cared for. 

God blesses us each and every day.  I pray that I can keep that more in mind...

A very accurate statement about love...

Yes, it is 1 a.m. and I am awake.  Not very shocking for those of you that know me.  Figuring that I might be a little constructive, I went in to iTunes to update my iPhone and decided while it was updating I would check out the new free Apps (applications that you can put on this handy-dandy little device.) 

Anyhow, looking for free books to put on there to read while I'm doing all of those fun tasks like waiting at the doctors office, the DMV, the Post Office (especially this time of year), I ran across a book called, "Why Did I Marry You Anyway?"  Of course, the title grabbed my attention and even made me giggle.

On the second page of this eBook, I found the following statement, which I instantly appreciated.  It is as follows:

Love is friendship that catches fire; it takes root and grows one day at a time.  Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity; you are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy; there are nagging doubts, unanswered questions; little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely.  It might spoil your dreams.  Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfections; it is REAL. -- Barbara Bartlein, RN

As Brian and I get ready to celebrate our 11th Christmas together, I can definitely relate to this.  I thought maybe some of you could do.

All my love,

Christy

An inspiring Sunday Sermon...

I have always prided myself on NOT being a CEO Chiristian aka Christmas. Easter. Outta there.  You know the type, some of you may even be the type.  However, over the past couple of years, that is exactly what I've become. 

I used to be much more dedicated to my faith then that.  (I am Lutheran.)  Even when I had four children under the age of ten, and my husband was never home, I somehow always managed to get there (and generally had the fun of juggling an infant who wanted to eat or who got a tummy ache and loaded their diaper and soiled their clothes right before having to walk up to the altar for Holy Communion, or something of the sort).

But somehow, I have constantly let L-I-F-E (I say it like a four-letter-word expletive) get in the way and have lost site of what is truly important.  Now, keep in mind that I somehow kept up with all of my responsibilities to the different boards and committees that I was on, but let my position with God slip in the process.

I have struggled immensely since September as most of you know, and every Saturday, my little boys especially start in with, "Mom, are we going to church tomorrow?"  I generally respond with something like, "I don't know.  Maybe.  We'll see."  I'm sure you get the point, and the next morning, mainly due to my inability to sleep; we never quite make it.

Well, with the Lord's help, we made it this morning and I am SOOOO very glad that we did.  I know in my heart that he wanted us to get there today, just to hear his voice through our pastor's words.  So, I'm going to recap it for the rest of you, so that maybe you can find some of the same much needed advice that you might have been looking for recently.
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By:  Pastor Bob Stone  (Paraphrased)

There once was a farmer who had a very old Donkey who fell down an old well.  It was the farmer's opinion that the Donkey wasn't worth saving, and so he called his friends and neighbors and asked them to all grab a shovel and come help bury this Donkey that was in the old well.

While waiting for his helpers to arrive, he threw the first shovel full of dirt down on top of the donkey, and as he did, was inspired with an idea:  Shake the dirt off of your back Donkey, then step on it and get back up."  So, shovel-full by shovel-full, the Donkey shook the dirt off as it hit his back until he was able to just step out of the well, that was of course his plight to begin with.

The lesson:  What seems to bury you, might actually be your personal avenue to freedom.  Shake it off and step up!

Also, to help and to prepare is not to be a helpless victim or circumstance.  Are we prepared? 
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There was some amazing Advent ponderings as well, but I'll save those, before this turns into a book.  I just absolutely was inspired by Pastor Bob's words today.  Maybe all of the weight that has buried me the last few months is my own personal avenue to get to where I need to be.  Something that definitely deserves some further thought......

God's blessings to you all,

Christy

Keep learning, keep moving...

It hasn't been nearly as long in between Blogs this time.  I'm impressed with myself.  Maybe I'm giving myself too much credit; I suppose that's possible.

I have continued to try and move upwards and onwards since my trip to Seattle.  I can't believe how after not seeing friends for 12 years, a visit with them is like ripping a bandaid off of a fresh wound.  We miss each other soooo much now!  I am planning on going back in January.  Even with five children, it's easier for me to get away then for my BFF.

I was thrilled to come home and have The Twilight Saga: New Moon be released that week.  We went to see the theater play the original Twilight movie, and then the midnight showing of New Moon.  I have NEVER seen so much passion from fans, or craziness at midnight at the theater.  It was fun to be a part of it though and I DEFINITELY am planning a repeat for Eclipse in June. 

It may seem funny for a now 30-year-old woman to love a saga so much, but as Stephenie Meyer, the author has said; she never wrote it with the teenage demographic in mind and who can't fall in love with a love story that is all about eternity and being in love forever?  I know that I can't.

We just survived Thanksgiving, and Black Friday.  Definitely one of my favorite weekends of the year.  We spent it with Brian's family and my mother-in-law put on one of her absolutely fabulous dinners.  She never ceases to amaze me.  Then, we went to a movie on Thanksgiving evening and stayed up ALL night and hit the sales beginning at 1:30 a.m., (well, actually 5 p.m. on Thanksgiving!!!).  All of my sister-in-laws and my MIL and I enjoyed finding the deals that help us complete our Christmas lists.

Kassie is getting anxious and is full of questions about leaving for college, but she has a confidence about her, too.  I'm so proud of her.

This is a new year for us.  We are doing things differently then we have ever done them.  I have ended some relationships that were definitely dead weight in my life, and even though it is probably best in the long run, it still makes my heart hurt.

I however, have to worry about me right now more then I ever have.  I have always put my children and other people ahead of things that I should have had as my first priorities and I have to learn from that.  Some days are harder then others, but some days are pretty good.  Today's been one of those days.  It's like taking a breath of fresh spring air on a 74 degree day.  Just keep moving...